Don't get me wrong. I love Jesus. I have for many years now. I love His Word and believe it to be true. I would have lost my mind a long time ago without God's Word as my anchor. With that, I agree with every word that Monty Williams said as he honored God, his wife, his family and even the family of the woman responsible for the accident.
BUT, I think that we (us Christians) expect grief and suffering to be tidy.
What makes me uncomfortable is the unrealistic expectation we put on ourselves as Christians. We quote Romans 8:28 and all should be okay. We often subtly expect our grief to look like resilience and composure just moments after earth shattering tragedy. I'm 100% guilty of distancing myself from grieving friends and family because it made me uncomfortable and I was unsure what to say. I force words I don't mean when I say, "I'm fine" to avoid others feeling uncomfortable. I isolate myself because how I feel about life as we hurt is certainly anything but tidy and composed.
Grief and suffering isn't tidy. In fact, it's excruciating and ugly. It looks like weeping on the bathroom floor for hours screaming for God to intervene. It looks like questioning everything you've ever believed.
While I applaud the example of grace and forgiveness shown in Monty Williams' words, I hope that we, the church, leave space for the untidy, wrestling with God's painful plans, sleepless nights kind of real grief.
Let's face it.
That's the kind of grief we have in common with Jesus anyway.
I want to be better at weeping with those that weep.
BUT, I think that we (us Christians) expect grief and suffering to be tidy.
What makes me uncomfortable is the unrealistic expectation we put on ourselves as Christians. We quote Romans 8:28 and all should be okay. We often subtly expect our grief to look like resilience and composure just moments after earth shattering tragedy. I'm 100% guilty of distancing myself from grieving friends and family because it made me uncomfortable and I was unsure what to say. I force words I don't mean when I say, "I'm fine" to avoid others feeling uncomfortable. I isolate myself because how I feel about life as we hurt is certainly anything but tidy and composed.
Grief and suffering isn't tidy. In fact, it's excruciating and ugly. It looks like weeping on the bathroom floor for hours screaming for God to intervene. It looks like questioning everything you've ever believed.
While I applaud the example of grace and forgiveness shown in Monty Williams' words, I hope that we, the church, leave space for the untidy, wrestling with God's painful plans, sleepless nights kind of real grief.
Let's face it.
That's the kind of grief we have in common with Jesus anyway.
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